Monthly Archives: July 2012

Save the best for last

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I guess you could call me a bbigot . I really and obstinately believe that the students sitting on the last bench of any academic institution are the gems of that class, untapped resources. Nobody ever realizes their true potential.

The last bench is a colorful world. There is always one misfit. Somebody who has been either forced by friends or has been insulted by them. That is the only reason why he/she is there. Somebody who really wanted to hear what his teacher has to say. Of course there are others who want to study even if they’re as far away from the teacher as possible. But they are limited in number. Like trees in the Sahara. .

The rest of the population was born funny. Humour and wit are innate qualities. They share a mutual understanding with the teacher. While they like to ignore the dull littany of lectures, the teacher ignores them based on, what I call, The Theory of EBBING, which says that intellect falls with one’s bench number.  While somebody is delivering speeches about how he/she did this and how he/she will do that, some people engage in the fulfilling task of mocking everybody. The rest believe in productivity.

The artists are all at the last, substituting notes for doodles that can shame google. Some show amazing talent every now and then with a comment for everything and everybody in a class. Laughter is the only acknowledgement they seek. Gamers, philosophers, bird watchers, even musicians-the last bench has it all.

All this is brought to an end by the teacher’s face reading abilities. It is very important to work on your expressions for this reason. Answering a question you didn’t even hear in the first place is an art. From giving your best innocent expression, to looking so deep in thought that might make someone believe you are working on the laws of nature. You deserve the place if you can read the answer of people in front of you from immense distances and under constant scrutiny if you can produce an answer that is correct.

So it’s a LIE if somebody says back benchers are the worst of the lot and do nothing but while away time. A lie, a false accusation. Trust somebody who has been on the first bench for too many years. You will have the time of your life sitting on the last bench.GET UP AND GO BACK!

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Planning to Plan ?…….MORALLY incorrect advice

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Can you delineate your present? On a chart? Picture? Diagram? Anything? don’t think too much in the question. Nobody can. You can draw a cartoon to show your mood, you can make a pie-chart for your activities, create a complex work of art to show how your parents and friends interact with you, but depicting all these together is no less than rocket science. So if you can plan your future, that hasn’t even happened yet! Well, you are better than extraordinary. You are INCREDIBLE.

       But for most of us plans we make at night see the shredder before they can see the light of day. They just don’t work! You perform the gruelling task of digging up your syllabus copy and your books, marking the syllabus, calculating the infinitesimal time you have to cover it and applying complex formulae to figure out how many chapters you need to do daily. Its a very tough task, but you sleep feeling like you have accomplished something. But the next day, its just a matter of an hour or two before that plan is in the shredder and you are off in your car, somewhere pointless, with equally hopeless friends taking a “break”.

       If you could not relate to this, try a diet or an exercise routine. out of the 13 people I saw flaunting their diet and gym plans, none made it past two days without indulging like  gluttons in some form of fat or a twelve hour sleep.

       The fact is there are way too many things influencing one thing you do. The possibility of you studying for example varies with the availability of an internet connection, notifications on facebook, how much your peers have studied, the release of new movies, how much activity your phone shows etc.

        How then, can you decide beforehand what and when you’ll study. And this applies everywhere. Plans to go out? Parental intervention(yours or the other party’s) can quell them in no time. Plans to give a piece of your mind to somebody can be seriously injured by the sudden realization that they may give you something more than words back.They might even be fatal. Plans initiated by feeling worthless, or seeing life without a future, seeing your friend do something cool and the likes generally last for an even shorter time.

        Plan all you like, I will never do a 9 to 5 job, I’ll buy that top tomorrow, I’ll start practicing the guitar starting sunday, I’m going to ask him out, I’ll do MBA and boost up my pay package. someone somewhere is rolling on the floor, laughing at your plans. the mystery of tomorrow is going to remain just that, a mystery. Its 2012!For all you know, we’re turning to rubble tomorrow.We are hardly INVINCIBLE. So chuck out your plans and spend that time doing something today. You can plan to make plans later .:)